“You are a pea-brained, prat-faced, pompous, pillock-headed cretin. If you took an intensive course of intelligence injections and studied till you drop, then one day you might make it to moron third class failed.” – Gareth Blackstock (Lenny Henry), dispensing his usual brand of sharp-tongued invective on Chef!
“No, no, no, let them. I’ve never had men fight over me before.” – Margo Durrell (Daisy Waterstone), as her brother Larry moves to break up a rather subdued scuffle between two suitors, The Durrells In Corfu
“We’ll always love each other… but in what way I’m not sure.” – Sarah Adams (Marta Dusseldorp) to George Bligh (Brett Climo) on A Place To Call Home
“Two words: boarding school.” – Cary Warleggan (Pip Torrens) advising George (Jack Farthing) about his son on Poldark
“Listen, Daisy. Tell Onslow to put a shirt on while I’m on the telephone. I can always sense him there, expanding.” – Hyacinth Bucket (Patricia Routledge), Keeping Up Appearances
“And it wasn’t until enough men had sailed to enough places that they realized that the faithful compass was lying. There was True North – the north of the Pole Star – and there was the Magnetic North – and, depending where on Earth you were, that varied. And, for a great mercantile empire like England, that was very bad news.” – James Burke, Connections (episode two, “Death in the Morning”)
“Thank god for small murders.” – Joyce Barnaby (Jane Wymark), grateful that her husband Tom (John Nettles) has suspended his “retirement” on Midsomer Murders