Sounds Familiar

“Hello! Yes, I’d like to speak to the manager please and be quick about it! Meldrew. No, he doesn’t but he will shortly! Hello, is that Mr. P.T. Sturgeon? Yes, well it’s about a large yucca plant your garden center delivered to my house this morning. Yes, a young chap, I didn’t catch his name – it may have been Frank Spencer. Well, I’ll tell you exactly what the problem is, Mr. Sturgeon! I was out the back, working in the garden when he arrived, so I asked him if, for the time being, he’d put it in the downstairs toilet for me and you know what he’s done?! He’s only planted it in the pan! Yes, actually in the lavatory pan, with compost and everything! I mean, how anyone can be so utterly goofy just boggles the mind! ‘A mistake anyone could have made?!’ Are you stark – I mean, what am I supposed to do, cock my leg against the trunk like a Yorkshire terrier?!” – Victor Meldrew (Richard Wilson), complaining about a home delivery, ONE FOOT IN THE GRAVE

Advertisements